ÂªÃ±Â¡Â§ ÂªÂ§hÂ®Âªff pÂªÂ®t II

Wednesday, January 26, 2005

Mothers-in-law. Hate them or love them they are always around when you don't want them to be around. Both of my mothers-in-law are great. The previous one a little bit more timid than the current one.

Yesterday I asked Ash whether his elder brother had kept in touch with him. He said no but the person did call the mother up to tell her that he had no money to eat. The mother called...who else...Ash and asked to borrow $30 which she would return this weekend. Luckily Ash was at work so he couldn't oblige his mother. She borrowed from Mas, the other daughter-in-law whose house she was in residence.

I told Ash I was sorry. Even though that is his mother and he is his brother I cannot permit him to give even a cent. I told him he had helped out enough. I was a little pissed off at his mother because she knows exactly the kind of son she has. She had specifically told me the other time she won't give any cash too. Ash said in spite of everything that is still her son. I know that. I understood that mothers won't abandon their children but still...

I told Ash I trust him with our finances. Me...I'm a spendthrift while he knows how to put aside a little bit of money for a rainy day. I told him I trust him not to do anything behind my back. If he did...He said everything decision he made he has always discussed it with me. Which is true.

Now is the time for us to save up for our marriage..our future. I don't need this kind of problem cropping up in our life. Having arguments about your in-laws...you can never win. So I try to adjust and take things easy. And when I do that people thought they can walk all over me. Idiots! I'm binding my time to get my way. I won't get much way actually when Ash is so yielding when his mother is concerned :-P That also pisses me off.

Bitching about mothers-in-law tskkk tskkk tskkk... Bad bad bad me heheh

i'm watching you...
Wednesday, January 26, 2005

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Monday, January 24, 2005

Tamy is a German girl who is obsessed with Lee from the group Blue.
Michael whose blog is kinda interesting. He just celebrated his birthday few days ago.
Unknown is Michael's friend. He is a sketch genius. Check out his site for comics and sketches he did.

I have been away. Melaka was great if you like the kampung life. I don't really dig the country life. I'm a city person. The mosquitoes bluwekkkk. I am always easy target for them. Must be all the sweetness in me heheh. The one incident that made me cry was when the guys (Ash and his male cousins) went out and brought home a live goat and got it slaughtered at home. The sound of the goat's cries was so childlike I broke into tears. I didn't eat any part of the meat. I can't.

Ash was thinking of building a house there. I don't know about the idea. All that need money...lots of it. He said we could save up for the next 5 years. Cukup ke? I don't know. I rather he buy a house in KL...dekat memberz aku..dekat disco...It's a Malaysian version of Singapore.

On Saturday 12pm I and Ash took the bus to JB then from there paid this lady driver $20 to send us home. Around 4 kita sampai rumah. Dah tu aku siap-siap for that dinner thing the company organised.

Sore point that...the dinner. It was a letdown. I was so looking forward to it being a fun-filled event. No much dancing. The music was lousy. The food was really bleah. But I did won some dumb presents for answering a very simple question (always close but never closed- what else if not 7 11?) and for wearing the shortest skirt. No luck in the lucky draw. Aku cabut siang...me and a friend went clubbing at Tunnel at East Coast. It was ok...it closes at 6am but I really didn't like reggae that much. Too many Malays. We decided soon after to become Cheeky Monkeys regulars.

I had fun at Tunnel...too much fun.

Single by Natasha Bedingfield

Ah yeah that's right
All you single people out there
This is for you

I'm not waitin' around for a man to save me
(Cos I'm happy where I am)
Don't depend on a guy to validate me
(No no)
I don't need to be anyone's baby
(Is that so hard to understand?)
No I don't need another half to make me whole

Make your move if you want doesn't mean I will or won't
I'm free to make my mind up you either got it or you don't

[Chorus:]
This is my current single status
My declaration of independence
There's no way I'm tradin' places
Right now a star's in the ascendant

I'm single
(Right now)
That's how I wanna be
I'm single
(Right now)
That's how I wanna be

Ah yeah Uh Huh that's right

Don't need to be on somebody's arm to look good
(I like who I am)
I'm not saying I don't wanna fall in love 'cos I would
I'm not gonna get hooked up just 'cos you say I should
(Can't romance on demand)
I'm gonna wait so I'm sorry if you misunderstood

[Chorus]

Everything in it's right time everything in it's right place
I know I'll settle down one day
But 'til then I like it this way it's my way
Eh I like it this way

Make your move if you want doesn't mean I will or won't
I'm free to make my mind up you either got it or you don't
'Til then I'm single

This is my current single status
My declaration of independence
There's no way I'm tradin' places
Right now a star's in the ascendant

Wishful thinking. But I think it will be great if I was single again. I am still very much in love with Ash. Wishful thinking. It's great to have somebody you love by your side. Someone to share your problems with, who can help you solve problems that you give up on, who can always be relied on. Being single...you can go out with anyone you want...kiss anyone you like...go anywhere you want to be...aizzzzzz. Wishful thinking.

i'm watching you...
Monday, January 24, 2005

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Monday, January 17, 2005

If you are into hot looking babes like I do (me ain't no lesbian though), check out Babe Blog.

I'm pretty excited about going to Melaka this Wednesday. And it's not even my own kampung. I'm staying there for a night there at least just to see if I'm mosquito magnet. If everything is ok, if I'm not the victim of mosquitoes, I will stay in kampung for the duration I'm there. If not, Ash has to rent a room in the resort. I will be away until Saturday. I'll be back on Saturday afternoon I think then I am going to the company's D & D event. So exciting lah! Wanna get drunk and boogie till the morning comes.

i'm watching you...
Monday, January 17, 2005

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Friday, January 14, 2005

Been away too long. Plain lazy.

Ash's brother smsed him last night asking for money. Told a pathetic story about having to move out from the friend's house, his wife is pregnant, blah blah blah. I knew Ash was in dilemma. Tak tolong dah orang tu abang dia. Ditolong menyakitkan hati. So I told him transfer some cash to the brother's account and then I was the one who smsed. I told the brother no more asking for money from Ash. He got other siblings he can turn to if he is that desperate. I told him I didn't want me and Ash to quarrel over him. Dah dapat duit tak tau nak reply pulak. Dasar sial betul! He better not have any contact with Ash again.

Mum was silent since the day I went to her place. Mentang-mentang lah anak emas dia dah balik, aku dilupakan. It's ok. I'm fine.

Early in the week I paid off my debt to Nana. Phewwww! What a relief! No more blabbering about me owning her money anymore in her blog. I hope. Thanks for lending me the cash anyway. I won't borrow from her anymore, I promise :-> I wanted to bitch more but what's the point?

Yesterday went to HDB for that very important appointment. Looks like we all have to move out by 27th Feb. Should I or shouldn't I? I am so hesitant of returning home. Especially without Ash. I don't think he wants to stay at my parents' place anymore. Not since the prodigal son had returned home. And frankly I am not so enthusiastic about seeing him again. Not after what he did. I was thinking about renting a house for at least a month before we get the keys to the new house. That was what the agent had said. Even then we can't move in yet. Flooring not done. Kitchen cabinets missing. Grilles not fixed. Aiyahhhhh all need money lehhh. Wa bo lui. At least not now. I'm scared that once money is in my hands everything also I buy. Wa lao wey! Luckily got finance controller >>> Ash lorrr heheh

i'm watching you...
Friday, January 14, 2005

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Saturday, January 08, 2005

Got 2 blogs for you to go. One is Wanda who is from Melaka. Since I am going there this month, it's a good idea to find somebody who is from there right? The other blog is Thaina. Bright yellow page with Avril Lavigne's pics all over. Word of a caustion though...If you don't know any other foreign language, forget about trying to understand a single word of what thaina had typed. I think she(or it a he??) is a Spanish-speaking person.

Been doing a bit of shopping.

(a)3 Packets of chicken rice with lousy soup at Jurong Point(Ash ate 2 packets and when I saw him eat my appetite was roused from sleep)

(b)McDonald's chicken foldover (we never eat this one before)

(c)Delifrance Shepherd's pie (Ash was drooling when looking at the menu photo)

(d)No Fear bag (I'm bored with the one I'm using now)

(e)Silver anklet (I wore 2 anklets on each feet and both broke)

(f)Earphones (mine is always damaged...within few weeks of usage)

Watched soccer match between Singapore and Indonesia. I expected Indonesia to win because frankly speaking they are better players. I could be wrong but our players have yet to prove they can play as well as any other country's soccer teams. Singapore team is leading by 2. I hope they don't think the victory is in their hands. Indonesia lost to Malaysia in Indonesia but beat the hell out of the Malaysians 4-1 in KL. Go figure. I just don't understand why our players are so selfish competing to be the one who score the goals. Bunch of idiots! Doesn't matter who score as long as we win lah nabey.

Don't think I have come to like soccer. I still hate to watch soccer matches but I have no choice when Ash loves to watch every single game on the tv. Aizzzzzz...

i'm watching you...
Saturday, January 08, 2005

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Friday, January 07, 2005

Too bad Phrase is a Man U fan. He has a cool blog.

The best news of the day -Ash bought me the Nokia 7260. Thanx laling. I appreciate it so much when I know you were yourself drooling as you went through all the features of the phone. I am going to get you a better phone..maybe the one you wanted. Not now but I'm saving up.

That's it lah. I tired lah. Just got back from Ash's brother place at AMK. Mother outlaw looked her usual self which is good. Most probably she psycho herself to get better so she can follow us back to Melaka heheh.

Goodnight!

i'm watching you...
Friday, January 07, 2005

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Thursday, January 06, 2005

Just back from meeting a couple of friends. As always when meet old friends, we talked about past memories and people we knew from a few years back. I intended to stay and talk for like an hour but time just flew by when you had fun. By the time I got home Ash was already snoring happily away heheh. Thanks guys for a wonderful time.

Yesterday I forgot to promote a blog, didn't I? I just found one. Just because helooked so cool with his cap on, I simply must add Ali I think that is his name. I wanted to send him a message but I don't know what his email addy is. Aiyahhhh. So how?

i still owe you one more blog URL right? Tomolo ok?

i'm watching you...
Thursday, January 06, 2005

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Wednesday, January 05, 2005

the woman is in control plz rate =P

☻WhicH ( ( SeX / SexuaL PositioN ) ) ArE YoU ? (UpDaTeD n PICz) z74
brought to you by Quizilla

You're like me! The intelligent loner. You're shy
at times but friendly, and you are never weak
and always independent. You are incredibly
intelligent (wise beyond your years) and have a
talent for many things (sports, music, art).
You have a kind and warm personality and enjoy
the simple things. Like hanging out with
friends and watching movies at home. But you're
sometimes quiet nature makes you a bit of an
outcast and a mystery to people. No matter how
pretty you are or smart or athletic, you just
can't seem to break into the crowd and be
noticed. Don't worry, try to be more outgoing
and speak out when you have more to say. Don't
hide behind your books and sports and computer,
get out there and get noticed. You also have
deep desires in life and feel vunerable and
alone at times. Don't feel sad either, What
helps me to express feelings and dreams that I
can't say to people, is through my writting.
Maybe you should try.

What kind of girl are you? (with pix!)
brought to you by Quizilla

CRAZY ONE. You need crazy partners. You dont mind
if he/she takes alc or drugs or smokes he is
not allowed to be boring. Open-Minded for
everything our partner should spent much time
with you. Your partner shall be spontaneous and
love danger. It is not that important if she/he
is rich or if he/she cuts his nails she/he must
follow you .You take the domination over the
relationship, you decide most of the times
where to go. If the sex is not good (any
more)you quit the relationship
For you it is better to leave than to see your
love restrained.
PLEASE VOTE, I want to know what you think about my
quiz, I worked hard on it.You can always
message me or tell me how I can improve that
quiz. Ill sure write back.

~THE big LOVE TEST!! What do you need? With PICS! For girls and boys!~
brought to you by Quizilla

i'm watching you...
Wednesday, January 05, 2005

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Having a frustrating day.

Had a frustrating conversation and we ended up blaming each other when all I wanted to know was where have you been all this time. No phone calls no SMS. Ok I admit I'm partly to blame too for never calling. But you didn't either. And what was I supposed to do? Pester you? Harassing you with phone calls and SMS day and night? When I know you are busy with your life? With your other half who I assume still disapproves of me for reasons only known to you and him.

A lot of things pisses me off. For one...you forgot my beladi birthday when I made it a point to put alarm on my handphone on your big day so that I won't forget to wish you. The other thing is you sent back my photos without informing me...at all. What am I? Batang kayu ke? Changing your URL without telling me the new one pissed me off too. Doesn't matter if your own sibling had to email you to get the paswerd which I tell you is crap. Dah dok satu umah kasi je lah orally. You made me seem like a beladi stranger you meet on the street. Am I not your friend? Am I not someone you know who will be there for you if you need me?

All that crap about you troubling your friends. Watzzup with that? Are your friends mine? The only girlfriend I had was you and you don't even bother to appreciate me. You know you only had to call me and I try and make time for you. But me...I had to wait to have 5 minutes of conversation with you. I tried to understand you...I put myself in your shoes...I tried to be patient something that I am definitely not...and for whom? For someone who obviously doesn't include me in her priorities list...for someone who run to me only when there's no one else to run to..

You know I don't have words enough to tell you what I feel. It's like no words can describe it. Yeah I will definitely return the fakking money that I owed you...the one you had been hankering in your blog that other time. Sure I'm late but I will do what I said I would.

You know what I had been through the last time I was close to a girl...and see where it gets me. And you doing it the second time round..with less nastiness...extra selambaness.

And you ran away. Before I finished having it all out with you, you ran away. How come? How is this going to be settled amicably if you run away? We could end our friendship today if that is what you want but I want to do it right. You say what you want to say...and I say what I want to say...After every single dissatisfaction is made known, we forgive and forget and get on with our life with or without each other. Can you do that? Can you not be a chicken and admit your own mistakes like I did? Just let it out.

i'm watching you...
Wednesday, January 05, 2005

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Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Found Donald after much searching. He's a Scorpio too but I think he's the better cook. And available. And cute. And he try out in the Singapore Idol even though he wasn't in the top 20. How cool is that?

Like always I switch on the pc when I get back home. The difference is that I have absolutely no mood to chat online. Maybe I should start make new friends again.

Talking about friends, I was messaged on MSN by this 23-year-old university guy who kept on harping about my bikini top, the one I'm wearing in my profile pic. What a bore! Obviously someone who is still having wet dreams in their sleep. Grown up and then message me again huh.

And the other I was pissed off was this beladi guy who messaged me on friendster and tried to hit on Ash. Fakking maggot! (No offense to the rest of u gay people) I told him to fuck off but apparently he didn't understand that so I had to block him from sending any messages.

Went to Clementi for dinner. Bought watches for me and Camelia. Bought her handphone housing so the next time I visit her I could give my current Nokia 3100 to her. Bought Ash this cap like something a Harley Davidson guy would wear. Bought food at pasar malam. That was a compulsory thing to do. Dah sampai Woodlands, singgah kedai runcit beli chocolate, another necessity. With the rate I'm eating, I am going to be so fat :-P

I need to go. Seldom have enough 8 hours sleep.

i'm watching you...
Tuesday, January 04, 2005

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Monday, January 03, 2005

Because of his cute looks, I'm adding Allen in here.

Nothing much to blog about. Work. Went home. Have dinner with Ash in front of the TV. On the pc. Watch more tv. Recharging handphones.

Ash got himself a second hand Nokia 6610. Poor baby! He didn't mind the fact that he didn't get to buy a brand new handphone. He's going to buy me the handphone this Friday. Or will it be on Saturday? I did gush about buying the new handphone in my last entry right?

Still have clothes to fold. I hate doing that. I don't mind doing laundry but folding them up...NO!

Got to go. Gonna watch Las Vegas. Cool series.

i'm watching you...
Monday, January 03, 2005

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Sunday, January 02, 2005

If you are into anything and everything gothic this might be a good place to start ------>>> Goth> I don't know what's her name though. Is it Lijie? Hmmm...

Heard this on the radio. With a few changes I could dedicate the song to my mother.

Perfect by Simple Plan

Hey dad look at me
Think back and talk to me
Did I grow up according to plan?
And do you think I'm wasting my time doing things I wanna do?
But it hurts when you disapprove all along

And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't pretend that
I'm alright
And you can't change me

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

I try not to think
About the pain I feel inside
Did you know you used to be my hero?
All the days you spent with me
Now seem so far away
And it feels like you don't care anymore

And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't stand another fight
And nothing's alright

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

Nothing's gonna change the things that you said
Nothing's gonna make this right again
Please don't turn your back
I can't believe it's hard
Just to talk to you
But you don't understand

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

I don't want to dwell on her too long. I'll get emotional.

To other more undepressing stuff...

It rained non-stop since morning but it quit pouring now...dammit! Me and Ash...we went to Causeway Point to buy his pre-paid SIM card. All the 7-11 we went to sold out on the damn thing. SO we went to this shop just underneath the MRT track and bought one..finally. That was after I got yelled at by your royal assness His Majesty Ash. After getting the beladi card he was all smiles and even apologised and admitted he was as ass heheh.

We went on a shopping spree for my new handphone. Yipppeee! Nope, we haven't bought it yet. Waiting for his bonus on Friday. I saw my dream phone Nokia 7280 is going on the market soon. I was practically drooling on knowing that. For now I decided to get that Nokia 7260 instead. I was actually considering Siemens L65 but nahhhh I have always had a weakness for Nokia. Because they are cool. Because they always come out best designs. Because they were durable for a destroyer of stuff like me. Because it is easy to use their phones. You don't have to pull out your in hair in frustration.

Ash's old handphone was found. His friend called him last night and told him. I guess whoever stole it from Ash had found the phone problematic - it keeps cutting you off during conversations as if it was low in battery when we had charged it fully every single night. Padan dengan muka! Ash guessed some China men who was working around the area took it.

Past my bedtime. Happy new year everybody!!! It's still not too late. I am not making any new resolutions. I don't think I would adhere to all that shit. I'm just making plans. Plans that change my life forever. God bless me!

P.S. I saw Taufik's video clip of I Dream. Aizzzz he looked so handsome in all white attire. He's not that handsome lah. He's like the Malay version of Shah Rukh Khan. He has charisma. Ash said when Taufik smiles it was like the stars shining brightly up above. And he's right.

i'm watching you...
Sunday, January 02, 2005

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I'm adding Lyvia because she is a cat lover too.

I have been away far too long due to inevitable circumstances (read: I didn't pay my internet connection bill fast enough and so it got suspended heheh). Lots of things happened.

My Christmas weekend was great. I went to Cheeky Monkeys at Mohd Sultan with a friend and we had so much fun...considering it was our first meeting.

My New Year weekend was ok. Went to Phuture..got drunk...danced like mad with Ash who got tired soon enough. Went to Newton for very early morning meal. Ordered veggie, chilli crab, clams, stingray. Ash complained the crab was too expensive and he kept bitching about it till the next day aizzzzz...

We spent too much. Groceries, clubbing, buying clothers. Headache if I think about it. But what is money if you are not going to spend it right?

Oh...the most important news of all...my mother's favourite child is back home. For good I guess. I'm happy because Mum looked almost like she she used to...before he left...I don't have to pay the bills no more..I don't have to crack my head open thinking about how to settle the house monthly payments but on the other hand, I am going to lose my parent attention once again.

Mum was relating about how he came back home...inside I was crying. I didn't look her in the face because I can't stand to watch the joy in her face. I got away as soon as I could. I told Ash it would be like it used to be. She is gonna forgot all about me...she's gonna been thinking about her son 24/7...I will be worthless to her.
I don't know if Ash understood what I was feeling...but I think Mum knew. She always did know.

The good thing that come out from this is that I could have more money to spend and save. I'm sorry for being selfish but I had enough of thinking about other people's welfare. For now I have to think about myself...my life. May you be happy with him.

i'm watching you...
Sunday, January 02, 2005

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