ÂªÃ±Â¡Â§ ÂªÂ§hÂ®Âªff pÂªÂ®t II

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Wednesday, May 12, 2004

Ash on MC for 2 days. His stroke is coming back...so apparent in his face. Mulut dia senget ke tepi and I tell you aku menyesal with whatever stuff I was thinking earlier in the day.

Papa...I know I have been such a bitch these few days. I'm sorry. I couldn't look you in the eyes tadi masa dinner because I did, I would have break down and cry. And I am trying so hard to put a brave front. I did cry tadi in the toilet while I was taking a crap. It was too much for me to take. I know you know I cry...because you know me so well.

I was just thinking in the morning that I would like to leave you and go back to my mom's place. I even thought about dumping you but that I know was all emotions talking. You know me...when I'm throwing tantrums I talk mostly shit.

Just so you know, I will NEVER leave you. I never could. I rather die with you then live without you. I wish Tuhan would give us some room to breathe before dia kasi kita dugaan sebegini rupa. I know everything happens for a reason...and yet...I am so tired of feeling depressed of having unsolved problems in my head all the time.

I hope you get well soon. I'm praying you will

i'm watching you...
Wednesday, May 12, 2004

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